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Fake Romance: Understanding a Seduction Addict’s Playbook
“What just happened?” That can be the feeling you get when you’ve encountered a seduction addict. These are the “nice guys” of sex addiction. But anyone who has ever dated a compulsive seducer can...
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Sex Addiction Deniers: What Makes Them So Mad?
The mere idea of “sex addiction” gets a lot of people angry. I’m talking here about the writers who rail about the “myth” of sexual addiction and who argue that the whole idea of sex addiction is...
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How to Survive Sexual Betrayal
Why do most spouses and partners react to the discovery of sexual addiction with such a sense of total devastation? Sexual betrayal is an emotional blow that can be harder to deal with than anything,...
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Why Sex Addicts Seem Sociopathic
To their partners and spouses, many sex addicts will, at some point in their addiction, seem to lack a conscience. They may lie, cheat, exploit others, think only of themselves and disregard the harm...
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Discovery of Sex Addiction in a Partner: What to Do First
When you first discover sexually compulsive behavior in a partner, it may be hard to think straight. Nevertheless, you are in a position of being a “first responder” in a crisis situation that seems...
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Sexual Secrets Make You Physically Sick
“You are only as sick as your secrets” is a common saying among recovering sex addicts and other kinds of addicts as well. What this implies is that you are keeping something about yourself a secret,...
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Sex with a Stranger: Addiction to Anonymous Sex
“Anonymous sex” is sex with someone you don’t know. The literal meaning of anonymous is “without a name” but it could be that you know the person’s name but don’t know much else about them. In fact,...
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Are Sex Addicts Drawn to Cults?
After coming in contact with a number of sex addicts who had at some point belonged to cults, I began to suspect that there were things about sex addicts’ makeup that predisposed them to cult...
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Are You “Enabling” Someone’s Sexual Addiction?
Let’s be clear—being in a relationship with a sex addict is the last thing you would ever want. Regardless of the behavior he or she is engaging in, including pornography addiction, phone sex, or...
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The Stigma of Sex Addiction Part 1: The “Non-Anonymous” Movement
Membership in Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) is currently growing at a rapid pace in the U.S. and abroad, with about a 20% increase in the number of weekly group meetings every year. SAA and other sex...
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When Your Ex is a B Movie
Old girlfriends and old boyfriends, ex-wives, ex-husbands, old lovers; all can come back to haunt you whether you are a sex addict or not. But if you are a sex addict or the partner of a sex addict...
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The Stigma of Sex Addiction Part 2: What to Tell Others About Your Addiction
“I am a recovering sex addict” is something you may or may not feel comfortable saying to people. On one hand, you may feel guarded about telling people anything, partly because you know that...
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Love, Sex and Intimacy After Sex Addiction Recovery
Sex addicts and their partners are sometimes in limbo. Sometimes they feel “Do I even want to be with this person?” Others have trouble visualizing what their relationship will look like post...
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Frequent Porn Addiction Relapse: 3 Tough Things You Must Do
Many recovering sex addicts find it almost impossible to quit internet pornography once and for all. Internet porn is different from other sexual acting out behaviors; it hooks people faster and can...
View ArticleThe Dangers of Sexual Objectification in Sex Addiction
What is “sexually objectifying” someone, and how is it harmful? In pornography addiction, it’s easier to see that the image on the screen is a sexual object rather than a real person. But when are...
View ArticleShould Recovering Sex Addicts Masturbate? Here’s the Formula
Sex addicts can be addicted to one or more of a wide variety of “acting out” addictive sexual behaviors and there is no one behavior that is addictive for all sex addicts. Recovering sex addicts...
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Sex Addiction Treatment: Is Couples Counseling the Answer?
In intimate relationships in which sex addiction is discovered, the question of whether to stay together arises, whether it is spoken about or not. Should they go to couple counseling right away? I...
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3 Key Features of Porn
Ask yourself what makes pornography pornographic. The usual answer is that it is intended to sexually arouse people. This is true but it is circular. The question is: what elements are essential...
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We Are All Survivors: Recovery and the Heroic Quest
“Nobody gets through childhood unwounded.” This is a saying in trauma and addiction work. We are all one in this experience of survival, we all have our own life journey and so we can all understand...
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3 False Beliefs That Keep You Sexually Addicted
Many people try hard to stop their sex addict behavior but can’t seem to get any “traction,” as they often put it. They may go for a few days, a week or a month without engaging in their sexually...
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